Love and Life on the Road as a NASCAR Newlywed
with Jessica Barile
By O. Michele Giacomini
June 14, 2017
When Jessica Barile married her husband, Tim, last December, she also married the sport of NASCAR. So now, for better or worse, in sickness and health, till death do them part, Jessica is joined to raceway’s hip, and she wouldn’t have it any other way! While car racing is an exciting sport, Jessica has come find that sometimes the life as a NASCAR Newlywed, isn’t so glamorous. But she isn’t letting little bumps in the road force her to the proverbial Pit Stop, instead she is working through life’s complications as a young married lady, living in a new town, building a foundation for a new marriage, and a new life for herself, and she’s putting it in writing!
I got a chance to catch up with Jessica recently as she told me all about her new project, which is her blog: Love & Life on the Road. She felt this was a place that she could share life’s trials and tribulations and hopefully help other newlyweds going through similar situations. Of course, I began to grill her on all of this, and this is what she shared:
OMG: Jessica, we know you’ve been married to your husband, Tim Barile, for just a short time, but what is life like, so far as a NASCAR newlywed?
JB: “Life is crazy for us NASCAR newlyweds. We got married in the off season so we did get a month or so together before the season started. Our life (consists of) long hours, late nights, early mornings, and a quick kiss in between. With my job and hours that switch every week, and Tim only home Sunday night through Thursday morning it makes some weeks harder than others.”
Jessica and Tim Barile at the speedway
OMG: So an average week is crazy and chaotic, but tell us what goes on when you do get to travel with Tim?
JB: “I only travel to local races within driving distance but those are fairly often. The most recent race I went to was Bristol, Tennesse. Tim and I left the house at 3:00am and drove 3 hours to get to Bristol, he worked hard all day and then drove home.
At the track I love watching what the team is doing to get the car ready, and I tend to harass the pit crew while they are setting up. At Bristol I got to go to an appearance with Tim for his driver, Jeffrey Earnhardt, and I got to go to the drivers meeting.”
Jeffrey Earnhardt & Jessica Barile at Bristol Motor Speedway April 17, 2015
OMG: That sounds interesting and fun! There’s obviously a little payoff in there for all the hectic times you go through. So, when you do have time together, what does a Hot Date Night look like for NASCAR Newlyweds?
JB: “We have just recently implemented date night or date morning depending on our schedules. Most recently it was breakfast at a little place nearby before I had to go to work. Before that we went out to eat at the Texas Longhorn, and the date before that was Chinese food, Barnes & Noble, and Ben & Jerry’s.
We don't do anything extravagant, but when we decide to go out of our comfort zone, it’s worth it. We went to Myrtle Beach about 2 months ago and trust me it was needed and much (appreciated).”
Tim and Jessica enjoying time on the water
OMG: What is the biggest obstacle you are experiencing as a NASCAR Newlywed that you didn't expect?
JB: “The biggest obstacle being a newlywed is that I wasn't expecting was being lonely. We did a long distance relationship for a year and a half, but I was with my family and his family during that time. When I moved here to Cornelius, North Carolina, I left our families and my friends. As a newlywed with a husband who travels, I find that I am lonely on my days off. But I am getting out there and meeting people.”
OMG: I can imagine the loneliness can be difficult to deal with at times? What do you do to combat those feelings?
JB: “The loneliness is hard. I tend to self wallow when I am feeling really emotional. I will text my best friends Julie and Jessica or I will talk to my mom and sister. I will go for a walk around the lake if it’s nice, because it reminds me of Tahoe a bit. The loneliness is going away more and more that he is gone and I am working. Work has been a great distraction since on the weekends I am working and I am working long hard days.”
Jessica finds time in her hectic schedule to relax and reflect whenever possible
OMG: Well, that’s good that you aren’t sitting at home doing nothing and that you are able to get out and meet people. What are you finding is the key to your marriage, so far?
JB: “The key to our marriage foundation so far is definitely communication, love and trust. Those have been the main key of our relationship from day one. I have always trusted Tim, (it’s everyone else I don't trust, *she laughs*) and our communication has had to be on point with doing a long distance relationship. Love should come naturally. I have never NOT loved him, even when he makes me irritated—I still love him.”
OMG: RIGHT??? *laughing* I mean, what’s NOT to love about Tim? I’ve known him for years and he’s a genuine, stand-up guy. He’s got a good heart, and he’s a kind soul—and I totally see why you two are together.
What tips would you give others in a similar situation?
JB: “I would tell other couples that they are normal. They aren't different, there are so many other couples like us. Some days are hard, some days are great, some perks are wonderful, and some aspects suck. Remember that your marriage is based on love and friendship and with those you can get through the hardest of times and the greatest of times. If you remember that being there for one another is essential you will be fine. You can’t be in a one-sided marriage and having a significant other who isn't home a lot, it can seem one-sided so it’s a matter of making the two of you important.”
Jessica and Tim on their Wedding Day
OMG: Okay Jessica, you know I have to put you on the spot. We just want to know, were you a NASCAR fan before you met Tim?
JB: “I was not a NASCAR fan at all before Tim introduced me to it. I thought it was stupid that cars went around in circles numerous times. *she laughs out loud* But I gradually learned a lot, and watched races every weekend and before too long I was actually really well versed and I have been able to teach others about it and I even listen to the races on an app on my way to work if I can’t watch.”
OMG: Sounds like you are now addicted to life in the fast lane! Thanks so much Jessica for your candidness. I know a lot of readers out there will want to read more about your Newlywed NASCAR adventures, and they can check out more here:
If you have any questions for Jessica, please leave them in the comments below.
Join me next week as when wine guru Jeff Burrows checks in with some advice on wines you should be tasting!
